I greet you, wishing you peace and salvation, as you are struggling with the stormy waves of life!
My response to your confession is: “Our Lord and God, Jesus Christ…. Amen.”
Do not despair and do not lose your faith, no matter how many times you might fall down. Preserve at least “one fleck” of sight and mind to see, comprehend and to deplore sometimes your condition – and you will not get drowned in the worldly sea. The Lord will not allow this to happen and at the critical moment, He will offer hand to you, as He did offer hand to the drowning Apostle Peter. “World will hate you,” said the Lord to His disciples two thousand years ago. This prediction has been repeatedly fulfilled until today with regard to all other Christ’s disciples. Another piece of advice is also working today: “Be of good cheer, I have overcome the world. The One Who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world,” says Apostle John the Theologian.
The word “world” is used here in its two meanings. The first is the world around us, the fallen humanity; and the second – the “old man” inside us, with passions and sinful inclinations. This “inner world” is the realm that is open to the devil. Here, he finds his tools to persecute and perish followers of Christ. But the Lord has overcome the world, has defeated the devil, so that against man’s will the devil is unable to do him any harm. Only those offering hand to the devil by their free will, come under his power. Those who resist the Devil and appeal to the Lord Jesus Christ for help, are safe; and all demons’ temptations may – and in fact they do – even serve for their good.
People should use their falls and “decrepitude” for the acquisition of humbleness. Together with humbleness people acquire a special inner state, an energy that is capable of fighting off all attacks of the devil. In this state, people no longer rely on their own forces, but exclusively on the Lord, Who is All-Powerful and Who has defeated the devil and continues to defeat him in our soul, when we are struggling against him not resorting to our forces but by appealing to God and by giving ourselves up to his Will.
Don’t let yourself up completely. Don’t think that confessed sins make the confessor feel repulsion. On the contrary, he feels special mercy and love for the repentant if the repentance was sincere and filled with regret. This is precisely what he feels! The confessor’s feeling so is proof that God forgives the repentant and with love accepts him into communion with Himself, just like He accepted the prodigal son.
So, courage! Let your heart get strong. “Who is in you is stronger than who is in the world.”
May God’s help accompany you in all your good endeavors, and may He grant you to be reasonable, and strong; and may He “establish you on the rock of His commandments” and bring you to salvation and everlasting joy. Amen.
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