Letters of Abbot Nikon

How are you? How’s your health? I would like to see you and talk with you very much. I’ve heard that you continue to drink much to the serious detriment to your health. What awaits man on this way? I am going to write below what.

If you do not struggle against this disease, you will fall under complete subjugation of demons. They will inspire you to drink more and more and undermine your nervous system as a result. You will become irritable and irate. Quarrels, light at the beginning will become harsher and longer. You will feel lack of money more and more acutely; you will be sacked from the job and as a result you will have to sell your belongings, ask people to lend you money in a humiliating manner, and maybe steal. Your annoyance will grow into demonic anger up to the desire to kill.

Demons, which used to act invisibly at first, will begin appearing in the image of thieves, wild animals, snakes and other creepers. They might appear personally, ugly and repulsive as they are. If you do not come to your senses even then, they might force you to commit a serious crime, such as arson, murder, and then lead you to blank despair and suicide. Had man disappeared for good after death, we would have been happy to see the end of his sufferings, but he does not. Drunkards, suicides move from brief and transient sufferings to the everlasting power of demons and to horrible tortures without end.

Unlike adherents to spiritual life, who struggle against sins and overcome them, gradually becoming sensitive to perceive the spiritual world and to see Angels, those who are given to heinous passions, especially drunkenness and dissipation, unless they repent, will see demons and will be enslaved by them.

The very differing appearances of people leading a spiritual life and those enslaved by the devil clearly shows where the two different ways go. “Wherefore by their fruits, ye shall know them,” says the Lord.

My dear Seryozha! Come to your senses: think, where you are going. If you find it difficult here, think how difficult it would be for you after death. Passions, by many thousand times more powerful than here on earth, would burn you without any possibility to alleviate them. Your conscience, like the “worm that never dies,” would devour your heart for the lost life and for the committed crimes. And your consciousness would torment you incessantly for having deprived yourself of eternal blissful life among the saints and Angels.

Seryozha, if you cannot give up drinking, try at least to realize that you are doing wrong, perishing yourself, mistreating those close to you and offending the Lord. Try to comprehend this and at least once a day bend before God and appeal to Him, say: “O, God, I am perishing, save me, don’t let me come to final perishing. God, be merciful to me, a sinner.” If you wholeheartedly repeat these words every day, the Lord will forgive all your sins and save you from perishing.

A criminal was the first to enter the Kingdom of God. The Lord arranged this to encourage and to console us, sinners. The Merciful God forgives everything to a sincerely repenting sinner. No sinner should fall into despair. Don’t say that you are already lost forever – this is a diabolic thought. The heavens rejoice about each repentant sinner, according to the Lord. He, our Savior, “came to seek and save that which was lost.” Don’t be afraid of demons. As soon as they appear call the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, make a sign of the cross on yourself and at the apparitions, and they would disappear as smoke. Don’t defend yourself by a knife or any other material weapon – they are not afraid of them. Defend yourself by God’s name. “They surrounded me, but in the name of the Lord I pushed them away.” That was how true Christians defended themselves against demons and taught us to do the same.

Seryozha, I have been always remembering you in my prayers. I promise to take out a particle from the alter bread for your sake at every Liturgy and ask the Lord that He may enlighten you and help you overcome this misfortune. But you, too, should undertake some effort and not offer hand to demons. At least once every day, bowing to the ground, ask the Lord not to leave you for perishing and save you from eternal sufferings. Show care for yourself and for Katya. You used to love her once, and maybe continue to love her. Do you, tormenting her so, feel no pity for her? Ask her to forgive you, if you happen to offend her so that the Lord may also forgive you. If you are not at peace with your kin, how will reconcile yourself with God? Don’t lose heart, no matter what you might have done. At a good moment, pray to God and He will help you and forgive you. Come to senses, Seryozha, show some care for yourself! Come to visit with us. Here, you will be able to confess and take the Holy Communion. Here, you will attend divine services, read religious books.

A sinful man, as I am, I care for you with all my heart. The Lord’s care for every sinner is by many thousand times greater. He just expects the sinner’s conversion to forgive him all his sins and misbehavior, and save him. Turn to God with prayer, repent your sins; go away from bad people and leave your damned service, and the Lord will save you. It is better not to work at all; just stop drinking and destroying yourself.

If you do not turn with repentance and humbleness to God, great sufferings will await you’re here, and after death where there is weeping, the gnashing of teeth, darkness, Tartar, the worm that never dies and unquenchable fire – everlasting, inconceivably horrible tortures.

No matter how difficult it might be here, all earthly hardships come to end. But after death there is eternity either of everlasting blissfulness or of horrible tortures. The choice is in our hands. God wants eternal joy for everyone, but does not forcefully draw anyone to Himself. If you don’t want to share with the Lord a life full of light and joy, you will have to go to the devil’s realm of eternal darkness and torment.

All written above is the undoubted truth. Do have pity for yourself, Seryozha; be merciful for yourself. Amen.

With sincere love and wishing you good, I remain your friend and father.

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